There was a man who died and went to Heaven. When he got there, he noticed clocks all over the place, just ticking away. So he asked St. Peter, "What are all those clocks for?"
St. Peter said, "Oh, each clock represents a person on earth; every time the person masturbates, the clock moves ahead an hour."
So the man said, "Well, where’s Boy George’s clock?"
St. Peter said, "That one is in the kitchen; we’re using it as a fan."