Impressions

Three young women are at a cocktail party. Their talk turns to their position in life, and it’s clear that they are trying to one-up each other.
The first woman says, "My husband is taking me to the French Riviera for two weeks," and then looks at the others with a superior demeanor.

The second woman says, "Well, my husband just bought me a new Mercedes," and looks about with considerable pride.

The third woman says, "Well, to be perfectly honest with you, we don’t have much money and we don’t have any material possessions. But 13 canaries can stand shoulder to shoulder on my husband’s erect penis."

The first woman looks shame-faced and says, "Girls, I’ve got a confession to make. I was just trying to impress you. We’re not really going to the French Riviera. We’re going to my parent’s house for two weeks."

The second woman says, "Your honesty has shamed me. To be honest, my husband didn’t buy me a Mercedes. He bought me a Taurus."

"Well," the third woman says, "I also have a confession to make. Canary number 13 has to stand on one leg."

Funny Jokes