Role Models

• Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan’ all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan’ all the kids to copulate me."

• New Orleans Saint  running back, George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."

• And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the ‘Skins say: "I’d run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl." Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I’d run over Joe’s Mom too."

• Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver about his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He even lets us wear earrings."

• Football commentator and former player Joe Theisman, 1996: "Nobody in football should be called genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

• Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."

• Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."

General Jokes