1. If two wrongs don’t make a right… try three.
2. Hookt aun fonix reelie wurkt fur mee!
3. You know that you should go to sleep when the sheep you are counting start to hit the fence.
4. I smile because I have no clue what is going on.
5. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
6. Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
7. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"?
8. If a cat always lands on its feet, and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?