A man walked into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five-iron wrapped tightly around his throat.
Naturally, the doctor asked him what had happened. "Well, it’s like this," explained the man, "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.
Well, we went to look for it, and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something protruding from its rear end. Sure enough, when I lifted its tail, there was my wife’s golf ball."
"And?" pried the doctor.
"Well, that’s when I made my mistake. I lifted the cow’s tail and yelled to the misses, ‘This one here looks like yours."