Chemical Discoveries

Take a look at two new additions to the periodic table of elements:
 
Element Name: Woman
 
Symbol: WO
 
Atomic Weight: (Don’t even go there)
 
Physical Properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze at any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if mishandled.
 
Chemical Properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a shinier specimen.
 
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
 
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.

General Jokes